Two weeks after my vacation, I lost that vacation feeling in the return of my everyday life. I’m once again completely back in my work rhythm. The fixed activities, waking up before the alarm goes off and eagerly looking forward to that first cup of coffee to start the day.
On the one hand these daily routines do make life more easy. Rather than having to think about everything, you just go along with it. As long as everything goes as planned, chances are that you’ll even have some energy left at the end of the week.
Though there’s also a downside. I notice that I’m less aware or living less consciously. Instead of getting inspired and seeing possibilities, my mind is focused on all the things that have to happen before the next weekend. So not living consciously at all, but mostly looking for distractions. Finding a sense of peace takes a lot more effort. I have to force myself to keep my attention in this moment. To (still) try and make meditating finally a habit.
Before I knew it, by Tuesday my mind would already be firmly fixed on the weekend. Though this isn’t what I wanted at all. I had all these good intentions and resolutions to start living more consciously. To try and enjoy every day.
Realization
I only realized this, when I was more or less forced to rest for a day. Once again I had one of those days where everything is too much. Instead of worrying of what was yet to come, I could only focus on how I was feeling now. In hindsight the was perfect timing, since it was the moment I realized that I had slipped completely back in my old and trusted rhythm.
The reason I had this revelation, was a dinner. Yes, a new milestone! I went out in the evening with a group of people for dinner. I can’t even remember the last time I went out to dinner in the evening. Naturally, I was much better prepared this time. I made sure I was rested in de preceding days, wore my earplugs, took breaks and made sure that I had a clear schedule for the following two days in order to recharge again. I thought I finally knew how to take care of myself.
And the result? Well, the dinner itself was a real success and those two days weren’t as bad as I expected. Which meant that by day three I was filled with confidence. This wasn’t so bad, I could do this much more often! As long as I planned it well, I should go out more!
These thoughts obviously jinxed the whole thing. 🙂
As the day wore on my body decided to let me know things weren’t as promising. Migraines, no energy and not being able to stay concentrated.
Apparently I’m still too enthusiastic about my own abilities. Nevertheless the rush of having done this, made it all worth it. Also I enjoyed myself so much during that dinner, that I didn’t really mind the bad moments as such. This did make me realize that I shouldn’t get too stuck in those daily routines. To try and enjoy the day more, rather than counting down to the weekend.
Wanting to live more consciously
I noticed that it helped if I could look back on something that had made me happy or given me a sense of pride, during these bad moments. Coincidentally I listened to a podcast where they made a comment along the lines of: life shouldn’t be a struggle with some happy moments, but a happy experience with some struggles. Well something like that, but this underlined for me the importance of tying to enjoy each day. Or to seek these kind of moments in every day.
So I decided to start and change some things. I also happened to read an article about the upsides of getting up earlier in order to exercise. By starting the day with exercising you don’t have to try and convince yourself the rest of the day to make a healthy decision and you also start the day with something you can feel proud of later on.
After viewing many YouTube videos, I finally found a channel with yoga videos that I could follow along. It’s now the third day that I’ve woken up half an hour earlier to start my day with yoga. So far, I like it. It helps when I start the day feeling proud of myself, as I already exercised. And I have to say that I’m sleeping a whole lot better in the afternoon as well. 🙂
Intention
By making small adjustments like waking up a little earlier, noticing my surroundings more and having a more positive mind-set, I hope to rediscover that happy feeling I had during my vacation.
Of course it’s still the question if I can manage to make this a daily habits, but the intention is there. Hopefully this will help to get through the hard days. As I’m sure those will happen, but it would be nice if I can bounce back a little faster.
Are you also counting down to the weekends? Have you found a way to find a way to find moments of enjoyment every day? Waking up earlier to exercise: a horrible thought, something you already do, something you wish your body would allow or other thoughts you want to share?
Evie you are a great writer. You could have easily split this up into four good
posts!
1. Rote routine does make life easier. Easy to forget that we can add
interesting stuff as we wish. Add something to your routine that easily
brings you back to yourself. Like time with friends and family. Or really
different stuff like “Start a conversation with somebody in a cafe about
whatever they like to discuss”. If you aren’t happy with your meditation
practice, then drop down to practicing one minute at a time, three times
before day. Just do it every day at the same time. Give yourself an easy
win, because, you are a winner, so why not
2. It is worth it to have some fellowship even if it will take a week to
recovery. Definitely.
3. Our natural state is one of happiness and ease. When we are unhappy and
diseased, something ain’t right and it isn’t supposed to be that way much.
It should be like a bell going off snapping us out of our doldrums. That is
cool that you are doing hatha. Add pranayama too it, hatha and pranayama are
great friends and they will be good friends for you.
4.
Q. Have you found a way to find a way to find moments of enjoyment every day?
A. Gratitude journal. 100% in my control. Free to write. And it is true. Then
in life-review journal I look at who I am and what I am about. It is a
gentle reminder and it shapes the day in ways I still probably don’t
appreciate.
Q. Waking up earlier to exercise: a horrible thought, something you already
do, something you wish your body would allow or other thoughts you want to
share?
A. I do a very light hatha routine. You don’t have to do headstands on
day-one. Hatha is supposed to be light and invigorating and gentle. So I
like that version and wish the world knew that hatha can be gentle and
easy, too.
Thank you! And thank you for your thoughtful response! I’m going to try your tip for the meditation practise (1 min 3x a day, that I should be able to do :)) Your words inspire me to write down my moments of enjoyments, to serve as a reminder when I can use it.
It sounds like you’ve found the things that really work for you and even managed to included them into your daily routine! I hope you’re doing well, take care!